Tracks
| # | Title | Sung by | |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Who Do I Have to f**k | The Cynthia Kaplan Ordeal | 3:06 |
| 2 | Fishsticks | The Cynthia Kaplan Ordeal | 1:47 |
| 3 | If Only (The Ballad of '93) | The Cynthia Kaplan Ordeal | 3:22 |
| 4 | Kaplan's Messiah | The Cynthia Kaplan Ordeal | 3:12 |
| 5 | Letter from Dr. Randall Berkhauser | The Cynthia Kaplan Ordeal | 3:44 |
| 6 | School Supplies | The Cynthia Kaplan Ordeal | 6:12 |
| 7 | Bride of Christ | The Cynthia Kaplan Ordeal | 5:23 |
| 8 | Hip Hip Hooray | The Cynthia Kaplan Ordeal | 2:31 |
| 9 | Vomit If You Must | The Cynthia Kaplan Ordeal | 4:56 |
| 10 | Gingivitis Can Kill You | The Cynthia Kaplan Ordeal | 4:08 |
| 11 | Merry Christmas to You | The Cynthia Kaplan Ordeal | 2:59 |
| 12 | The Goodbye Song | The Cynthia Kaplan Ordeal | 0:32 |
Member reviews
Source: MusicBrainz release group 128d9696-8466-4fd8-8499-d34ea3d39ec3 (CC0). Cover: Cover Art Archive.