| 1 | Act 1, Scene 1 | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 1:20 |
| 2 | Somehow He Contracted Self Diagnosed Aspergers | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 0:49 |
| 3 | Attack of the Cannibal Quacks | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 1:03 |
| 4 | Act 12, Stage 8 | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 0:23 |
| 5 | A Stripper Named Gertrude | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 0:31 |
| 6 | Paula Deen Sings the Hits: Twisted Sister | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 0:34 |
| 7 | I Hope Some Dude From a Black Metal Band Takes a Picture of You After You Blow Your Brains Out | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 2:03 |
| 8 | Jamie Bunker’s Power Mullet Says Gaiares Is Pretty Awesome | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 0:25 |
| 9 | Ladies and Gentlemen, Schadenfruede and the Pips | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 1:34 |
| 10 | Imogen Heap Shall Serenade Them When They Die | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 1:03 |
| 11 | I've Lost My Library Card, I'm in a K-Hole, I'm a Prick | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 0:44 |
| 12 | Hellbent for Heathers | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 2:02 |
| 13 | Act 6, Stage 9 | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 0:51 |
| 14 | Music for 13 Year Old Girls to Cut Themselves To (When They're Not Throwing Acid at Each Other) | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 0:55 |
| 15 | My Soul Infested With Swimming Horses of Blood | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 0:35 |
| 16 | The New Scared Straight (As Proposed by Tossed Salad Man) | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 0:09 |
| 17 | The Trend Is Undead (The Great Zombie Trendkill - Fuck Yeah) | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 0:41 |
| 18 | Bomb Hollywood Before Michael Bay Makes Another Film | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 1:35 |
| 19 | Telemundo Estilo de Vila Masoquismo | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 0:42 |
| 20 | The Christine Chubbuck Anniversary Special | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 0:42 |
| 21 | Act 77, Stage 9 | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 0:26 |
| 22 | Pissing on Your Kids Roadside Memorial | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 0:17 |
| 23 | Act 18, Stage 77 | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 0:13 |
| 24 | The Perils of Penelope Pin-Up | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 1:56 |
| 25 | Quit Encouraging Bedroom Mosh Nintendo! | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 1:08 |
| 26 | Like an Autotune Giraffe | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 1:04 |
| 27 | Loldongs? Fucking LOLDONGS?!! | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 0:20 |
| 28 | Cannabis Mutants From Outer Space Washed My Dishes Yesterday, I Thanked Them and They Gave Me Free Tickets to a Michael Jackson Concert | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 0:36 |
| 29 | FINAL STAGE | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 0:50 |
| 30 | I Just Fell Asleep and You Woke Me With Your Cannibalistic Soccer Errors | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 2:08 |
| 31 | Should Have Died at Twenty Seven | Kindergarten Hazing Ritual | 1:23 |